Bopping back and forth from the bed to the bathroom floor was not my idea of fun these last few days. Stuck in the house with a stomach virus since Tuesday when I foolishly tried to go to work gave me time to ponder. Ponder what, I don’t know. Maybe I should have thought about my idiocy when I got in the car at 7 am to head to work.
From 2 am to 6 am I spent most of my time with my head in the toilet or my ass in the same place. Just typing that “skeeves me out”. Ass – face, ass – face, ass – face. Our heads should never been where our asses have already been but I get it’s one necessary evil for all of us at one time or another.
So at 6:30 I got up, showered, dressed and headed up the Garden State Parkway with 2 Ziploc bags as my passengers. Halfway up the parkway, the cold sweats started and I started to get dizzy and nauseous. I grabbed my first passenger and drove the rest of the way, Ziploc bag beneath my chin and praying I wouldn’t have to pull over. Damn John! I thought I had food poisoning from the Mascarpone cheesecake that he baked the night before. I couldn’t believe it was getting worse instead of better.
When I pulled into the Dwight Road faculty parking lot, I didn’t think I had the strength to get out of the car. I waited a few minutes and mustered up some vigor and staggered into the building, up the stairs and right into the bathroom heading for my stall. I was sick again! I must have been crazy for coming in. What was I thinking?
I called my friend Barb (who is the school nurse) from my Blackberry while I was sitting on the dirty floor of the handicapped bathroom and explained my predicament. She met me in the hallway and told me that I should leave and she would let the office know what was going on. I teetered to my room and starting writing plans.
Tout a coup a sub was at my side and I was sent home. I felt like I was in high school again. I managed to drive directly to the doctor’s office to find out what was wrong. The doc checked me out, took a couple samples, gave me a VERY painful shot in my ass, handed me 2 prescriptions and sent me on my way home.
It took me 3 days to recupe both my health and my dignity but I returned to work today. I woke up at 5 am and couldn’t wait to leave the house. Did I mention that John is home all day?
I got there at 7 and couldn’t believe how happy I was to be at work. I needed human conversation. No meowing, no fur, no skid marks on the cat safety sheet. I needed my routine – surtout, my sanity. Don’t get me wrong, when I was lying on the bathroom floor in the middle of the night my 2 wonderful and caring kitties were by my side the entire time while my husband was snoring peacefully in his room. I just needed to be with my kids at work. All of the kids, even my skootches. It would be a great day!
A great day until a few of my 4th period skootches informed me that someone had left my phone number from the fax on their dittos. “Ooooo. I have senora’s number.” Great! Now the prank calling would start. I told them, “Big deal, rip it off the ditto and don’t call me.” They giggled and I forgot about it…
Until 7:39 pm this evening when I received my first prank call from a “Raul”. I promptly laughed it off, told them to stop bugging me and not to call again. They hung up and I dialed *57 to trace the call. We’ll see what happens on the phone front. Ugh!
Did I say I was happy to be back at work?