You all know that I love to be around little kids……NOT! My friends know that I get along great with teenagers but little ones scare me. Children usually end up liking me but I could never figure out why. I don’t give them the time of day.
I hated babysitting. I always liked being around adults as a child. I never had kids because I never had the urge to be a mom for more that a couple of hours. I had a husband with 3 daughters so I figured I was set for children – we all know that didn’t work out. Anyway, when I was a teenager a had a few babysitting jobs for some extra money. I babysat my cousins, the neighbors kids, etc. It was torture. I was 15 years old when I changed my first and last diaper – and it was a doosie!
So being around rug rats is Hell for me because my patience and tolerance is limited. In the past I have even suggested kennels for kids. It would be like a 5 star hotel for brats when their parents want to have some quality time together. I thought it was a good idea.
When I went to get my cut and color today I was hoping for a quiet, gossip magazine marathon. I wasn’t thinking about “Bring Your Child To Work Day” but maybe I should have been.
I walked into the shop and walked back to the color chair where I saw a cute little girl playing with a variety of toys. It was the owner’s niece and I thought nothing of it until the not-so-shy 5-year-old decided that she wanted to be my friend. It’s like when someone doesn’t like dogs and the dog goes right to that person. I’m like that with gamins and gamines alike.
Once I got settled in the chair with my copy of US Weekly, the girl came up to me, stood next to me with no air in between us and started to chat. When she finally went away I thought I was safe until I went over to get washed out in the sink. She stuck her germ-infested puss in my grill and started making noises and faces in my personal space bubble. If that wasn’t bad enough, while the operator was removing my foils, the kid turned the water on full-blast so the unattended hose exploded like a geyser all over my face and my body.
I stayed calm surprisingly. I wiped myself off with a towel and started to enjoy the hair wash. My peace was short-lived when the little guttersnipe ran into my arm (ouch!) and actually gave me a black and blue. WTH?
With a smirk on my face and a bruise on my arm I made my way over to A’s chair for a much-needed cut. A running child is not a good thing when there are scissors close to your face. I was nervous wreck but I escaped the pointed weapons only to move on to yet another annoyance.
Of course the pain in the ass had to come right over and play with her horsies right next to my Guess bag. She tried to move it and put in on the floor and thank God was promptly reprimanded and my purple baby was safe.
I felt like washing my purse and myself down with disinfectant as children breed disease like rats. Do you think I’m being too harsh?
© 2010 J. H-M. and CultureChoc2010.