Can I do Chuck?

I was watching A Walk on the Moon today when it brought back a childhood memory for me that I wanted to share with you.  In the movie Diane Lane’s character’s son asks if he could do Chuck… Let me explain.

When I was growing up my Aunt Mimi taught me this little rhymey thing that I used to chant all the time.  Let’s use the name MARY.  It went something like this:

  • Mary Bumbary Tree airy go Fairy, tee like-a, tee like-a, bow-legged Mary.

Let’s try the name Tony:

  • Tony Bumboney Tree oney go Foney, tee like-a, tee like-a, bow-legged Tony.

Now for Chuck – who I ALWAYS begged for – but like the kid in the movie – always asked permission:

  • Chuck Bumbuck Tree uck go Fuck, tee like-a, tee like-a, bow-legged Chuck.

Although the movie used a different one, you can see the appeal for a little kid.  I always heard the word but wouldn’t dare say it without my favorite limerick.

Then enter my first cousin Janice – 17 years my senior.

Janice loved to trick me into saying dirty words and reciting limericks to my parents and relatives, only to be rewarded by, “Jackie!  Don’t say that!”  This reaction even made it more interesting to a push-the-buttons little girl who loved to test the boundaries.

The funny thing is that I remember EVERY SINGLE WORD.  I am the Valedictorian of dirty limericks and spout them on occasion at parties and social gatherings – prefacing my performance with the disclaimer I mentioned above.

Does anybody remember…..

  • There was a man from Boston, who bought a little Austin.  There was room for his ass and a gallon of gas and his b**** hung out and he lost them.
  • There was a man from Saint Paul who worked in a musical hall.  His favorite trick was to stand on his d*** and roll off the stage on his b****.
  • A loving young couple named Kelly are now living belly to belly, because in their haste they used library paste instead of petroleum jelly.
  • Nature, nature, nature it’s the law, law, law when a guy gets a girl against the wall, wall, wall…….(and so on).

And the infamous……

  • She was coming round the mountain doing 60, when the wheel on her motorcycle broke.  She was laying in the grass with the muffler up her *** and her **** were playing Dixie on the spokes.

As dirty limericks go, they’re pretty good.

Does anyone remember anything similar in their lives?  Do tell.  I don’t want to be the only freakazoid on Earth.

Image: Darren Robertson / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

© 2010 J. H-M and CultureChoc2010.

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6 responses to “Can I do Chuck?

  1. A favourite from autograph books:

    On top of old smokey, all covered in grass, sat a bald eagle scratching his…
    Don’t be mistaken, don’t be misled, the little bald eagle was scratching his head.

    and for Christmas cheer:
    Jingle bells, batman smells, Robin ran away. Wonder woman lost her bosoms riding open sley – HEY!

    ok, they are even more immature than yours, not quite as dirty, not lyrics but never fear, you are not alone.

  2. Don’t forget….Andrew Dice Clay became very famous for his dirty versions of nursery rhymes and limericks!

  3. Vicky Smith Markovic

    Oh yes, Andrew Dice Clay…my fav was Hickory dickory dock some chick was sucking my …

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