Tag Archives: children

500 Reasons NOT to Procreate

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At the age of 43 I am 99% sure that I made the right decision by not having any children.

For years I was on the fence, always unsure and always ready with an excuse.  My husband wanted to “knock me up” as soon as we got married but I always came up with a sound reason not to do it.

My cats are so much work that I can’t imagine having children.  I give parents a lot of credit.  Although I think I’d be a great mother if I had a baby, unless God surprises me, I’m not planning on.  My ship hasn’t sailed yet but the older I get the less patience I have for EVERYONE.

Every time I see my friends having problems with their kids, I say “Reason number ____ I never had children.”  A bit of a joke but totally true for me.

So I decided to compile a list of reasons that I’ve used and I will post them here and then once I get a good list going.  A list that rings concerned and selfish – I make no excuses for it.  So here we go…

  1. If I wanted to come home at a certain time, I would have dogs or kids, not cats.  As far as I’m concerned dogs are too much work.
  2. Children cost money – a lot of money – for the rest of your life.  I know my Daddy is still so good to me.
  3. I would worry 24/7 about my kids – and I can’t do it.  I worry when I can’t find the cats in the house!  I won’t rest until I locate them.
  4. I don’t change diapers.  I changed 2 in my life – that was enough.
  5. I always HATED babysitting… enough said.
  6. I would have to give up my $300 shoes for $30 ones.

To be continued…

© 2011 J. H-M and CultureChoc2010

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As Christmas Approaches… My Emotions Are Off The Chart

After blogging about Christmas music yesterday, I decided to load up my ¡POD with some new holiday tunes and listen to them on the way to work.

As usual, I left my house in an utter tizzy, trying to feed 4 cats, get my lunch together and set the alarm.  I hopped in my car and plugged in my ¡POD – but first I had to wait for the traffic report.

As a Garden State Parkway commuter, I have to listen to the traffic BEFORE I leave in the morning because there is always some accident, rubber-necker or left lane dick who gets in my way.

I turned onto the main drag and saw something lying in the road.

Oh no!  A kitty!  OMG!  Someone just left him in the street to get squished.  Why do people let their cats out?

My eyes filled up with tears and I started bawling over this poor unknown (to me) kitty’s life and how his or her family would feel when they saw the lifeless, innocent corpse laying in the middle of the road right before Christmas.

What a shame!  Maybe I should get out and put it on the side of the road?  Who just left him there?

This is ridiculous.  I need to get my mind off the cat.  Ok.  I already heard the traffic so I’ll listen to my Christmas Playlist.  That should work.

That did not work!

I can only imagine what the people on the Parkway were saying about the hysterical woman in the faux chinchilla in the black BMW soaring up the GSP like a fighter jet involved in serious combat over a hostile territory.

They thought – no – knew I was losing it… and I was.

Dammit!  My eyeliner!

I tried to stop crying so my eye makeup would not be a total mess but it didn’t work.  I composed myself somewhat only to drift back in to a sob or two and one too many tears over the dead cat, my dead mom, my dead family, my cat that I’m going to give away so she can have a good home where she will be the queen of the castle and not just one of the many royalty milling around at Versailles, my marriage, my bills, my weight gain and then back to the dead cat and my dead mother.

And that was all before I got to work!

Ten seconds into Amy Winehouse singing “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus“, I started to sob uncontrollably and think about when I was little and how my mom and dad created so many great Christmas memories for me.

I remember waking up early on Christmas morning and creeping down the stairs.  Once I peeked into the living room and saw all the presents under the tree, I ran back upstairs, jumped in bed with my parents so excited that Santa came during the night.  I couldn’t contain my joy.

I ran downstairs with Mommy and Daddy checking to see if Santa ate the cookies that I left and drank the glass of milk alongside.  All that was left were crumbs and an empty milk-stained glass.

Santa!  Thank you for coming!

I  flew under the tree and started examining the gift tags.

  • To:  Jackie  From:  Mommy & Daddy.
  • To:  Jackie  From:  Santa
  • To:  Daddy  From:  Santa
  • To:  Daddy  From:  Mommy
  • To:  Mommy  From:  Jackie

and the list goes on.

I was always happy about Santa’s choices.  I loved my Barbies – anything Barbie!  I loved it all!  The only thing I never got that I wanted was a motorized, battery-powered car from Sears.  Oh well….

I used to mark-off everything that I wanted in the Sears Catalog so that my parents could tell Santa what I really fancied each Christmas.

Mommy has been gone for almost 6 years and it still seems like yesterday yet so far away.  And every year I get melancholy over my family who cannot be here with us on this Earth – but I do hope and pray that they are watching over us from Heaven.  Guiding us.  Protecting us.  Yet somehow celebrating Christmas in Heaven so they can be around family too.

Pretty soon there will be more of us up there than there are down here – if there isn’t already.

I usually start my holiday depression in November but somehow it seemed to be better this year.  What was really happening is my head and my heart were storing it all up so I could have a proper emotional breakdown today.

The funny thing is that I never stopped listening to the Christmas music!

My battle has just started.  I love the holiday season but often pine away for yesteryear and long to see my loved ones again.

I hope you can survive the same because I know my mom would not want me to be upset but would want me to celebrate the life that I have and the life that’s ahead of me.  I hope you can do the same.

Merry Christmas!

© 2010 J. H-M and CultureChoc2010.

Image: graur codrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Do The Excuses Ever Stop? Enabling, Mommy Texting & Other Evils

The school year is winding down and most World Language classes are preparing for final exams. Both the students taking exams and the teachers giving them are stressed, to say the least.

EVIL NUMBER ONE: Enabling.  The last thing we need is more stress.  It’s the end of the year for Christ’s sake!  Four full days.  Four full days of exams.  Four half days for students and 1 day of graduation.  So why are parents still making excuses?  Why are guidance and the CST still ENABLING?

Because it’s all about the CHILDREN?  Give me a break.  If it were all about the children, there would be consequences.  Consequences for bad behavior, laziness and truancy are just a few.  If it were about the children there would be more administrative discipline, more in and out of school suspensions and more children being retained.

Why do the powers that be insist on pushing kids through when they do absolutely NOTHING, they can’t read or write and they are horrible disruptions to the entire class?  Let them fail.  Maybe it would be a good wake-up call for these students and their parents.  Maybe if their kid is 16 and still 7th grade, they would be so ashamed that they would finally stand up and be good parents.

Parents need to stop being their children’s friends and start acting like moms and dads.  Start acting like parents.  Kids need discipline.  Kids need consequences and boundaries.  Caregivers at home and school should be able to recognize the manipulators – and there are many.  I get sick to my stomach every time I think about it.

I know teenagers.  They will manipulate, lie and try to get away with as much as possible if you let them.  That’s normal.  Allowing them to have a free-for-all is NOT!  We were all teenagers once.  We were the same but we had the fear of God and our parents.

I was afraid of my parents.  Afraid of disappointing them and afraid of getting trouble.  So many children nowadays have NO FEAR.  Seriously, no fear.  I’ve been in IEP meeting when a young girl stood up and called her mother a Bitch.  Mommy would have back-handed me – but I don’t think I would have had the nerve to say something like that to begin with.

EVIL NUMBER TWO:  Mommy Texting.  Did you ever e-mail a parent or give them a call to update them on their child’s progress or lack thereof and 10 minutes later, their child comes bursting into your room, in the middle of your class, protesting with a foul attitude?  This is a result of Mommy Texting.  A text sent to a student by his or her mommy telling them what Ms. So And So said about them.  Where do they get their nerve?  No cell phones in school means NOTHING.

EVIL NUMBER THREE:  Rewards for social retardation.  Ice cream for the mal élévé.  How can rewards, such as pretzels, candy and ice cream be a punishment for bad social behavior.  Slamming your backpack on a desk, fighting with classmates, overtly hating and alienating everyone around you and doing ZERO, nothing, nada, niente and rien are surely great reasons to be penalized by ice cream and sugar.  All the other kids talk about it.  It’s embarrassing.  I’m embarrassed for them.

EVIL NUMBER THREE:  The Running Excuse Via Parental Manipulation. “Ms. Jones, please e-mail me as soon as Fred starts having problems.”  Why do I bother?  With 13 days left of school I’m still hearing the same old song.  He said he did the work.  He said he’s not talking.  He said he’s paying attention but just doesn’t get it.  Well… get your ass in here for extra help and stop whining!  We did it in class TOGETHER.  It was a class assignment and if you did nothing (which is probably the case), you had to take it home for homework.  I can’t wipe your asses for you dears.  Someday YOU will be accountable.  I cannot wait for the day!

So when will this generation (and I’m not talking about all of you – you know who you are) of parents rise to the occasion and step up to mold their children into hard-working, productive, non-whining members of society?  When?

I don’t know if that day will ever come but I wish they would stop masking their poor parenting skills and own up to it.  In my opinion we’re raising a weak generation of complainers.

Ladies and Gentlemen, step right up to see the pussification of America at its best!

Image: Francesco Marino / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image: Suat Eman / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

© 2010 J. H-M and CultureChoc2010.